Thursday, January 04, 2007

Cheap euphoria achieved while still in pajamas

A while back, I lost my passport. I can't remember exactly when this was, but it was during some large and epic room restructuring and I put it somewhere thinking "it's safe here" and then, of course, completely forgot what that something was and where that something went. I do this quite frequently. In other words, do not let me watch your children.

Then, late last night, I realized I actually needed my passport today. Some sort of work restructuring thing where they needed two forms of identification. Boring stuff. So I spent a good half hour last night picking up boxes, opening drawers, patting down jackets, and cursing under my breath. I began concocting excuses for our Human Resources lady ("I had my passport, honestly, but I was mugged on the way here. By a naked woman. On a horse.") and went to bed dejected.

Flash forward to this morning. Woke up after a dream about zombies (lots of zombies), sat up, and, strangely possessed, I went to the closet, pulled out a box I'd already looked in, pulled out a manila folder I'd somehow ignored, and found my passport in about thirty seconds.

Now, there are plenty of simple pleasures in life: eating your roommate's ice cream, learning curse words in different languages, knowing final Jeopardy when the contestants don't and then gloating at the TV during the credits. But there's really nothing better than finally finding something that's been lost for months. Sheer joy, I tell you. Plus, now I get to say I never lost my passport, I simply misplaced it. For half a year or so.

I know I should be taking something substantial away from this, some maxim to remember in times of strife. Something like "never give up" or "it's always in the last place you look" or "that's the way the cookie bounces" but I'm not. I'm just feeling way too proud of myself for finding something that should have never been lost in the first place. But hey: what joy would I have gotten if I knew where the thing was last night? None at all. I think I'll go home and hide my keys and my wallet, get too drunk to remember where, and have a thoroughly fulfilling Friday.


Sabrina said...

Syd lost lost her Zune Tuesday evening. We turned the whole house upside down. We unfolded and folded blankets, we move couches, lifted matresses and cleaned. I even put on a pair of rubber gloves on and sifted through trash. That had the remnants of a crab feed 4 days prior!
My thinking was maybe the baby threw it away. He's been experimenting with the garbage can, opening and closing the lid. Twos hours later... I decided to look in her backpack. She swore she has looked twice already. Tears & boogers everywhere. What did I find in a bag, in a bag, in her backpack but the Zune! All I could do was smack her on the side of the head.

Sabrina said...

oh we just got an alert as well. Seems that there is a new law.

NEW Passport requirement
Effective January 8, 2007 anyone entering the United States by air or sea must have a valid passport. This includes US citizens who are currently only required to provide a certified birth certificate and photo ID when entering the US from Canada, Mexico or the Caribbean.

birdmonster said...

I don't even think that counts as lost.

And yes, I've done the exact same thing. With an iPod. Syd & I are members of the same elite club. Not a good club though. A bad one.

Sabrina said...

gadgets are just getting too small. It's easy to misplace things, drop them on Muni or BART and not know it. It's a set up, They get you to buy more than 1 when you need to replace the lost one. It wasn't this easy to lose your boom box in the 80's.

Chris Walker said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
SOL's view said...

I'm likely to find lost things six months later when I am looking for something else I have lost....

elvette said...

Did you do the jammy dance when you found it?

The song goes;
"Hoooray, hooray for jammy pants/Let's do that jammy dance."
And the dance involves shuffling from one side of the room clear across to the other while circling the arms at the wrist, jazz hands optional.

krisan said...

now i'm getting a bit paranoid trying to figure out where my passport is. although i do kind of hope it is a bit of a struggle to find, i know the feeling of said fulfillment. and sweet diggity is it good or what.

and you're right, these carrots kind of suck.

Katie L. Thompson said...

Whoa. Krisan, you read this, too?

krisan said...

ahaha katie, i started last post!

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